How Jesus Is Teaching Me (Mer) Via Our Lil Girl

Today I was emailing with my Sis in Christ, Patty, and discovered a few things... Slowing down, quieting my thoughts, and reflection can do that :)...

She had seen the 20 week baby ultrasound video and loved seeing baby Girl Black's eyes moving...
In response, I said that seeing the baby's eyes, hands, legs, etc made me cry each time. I'm in awe. Truly in awe that God has given us another daughter to take care of. Humbled in deeper ways that I have been.

I realized that I wasn't really able to truly understand what pregnant moms and dads were going through. Even though we had lil' Rose for 10-11 weeks last year, I couldn't wrap my mind/brain around the miracle of knowing a baby... a lil' person was growing inside of others I knew. All I knew was what I saw and what i didn't have. Despite wanting to join in fully with their joy I found myself limited with scope and a narrow capacity to empathize.

My mind knew it was utterly miraculous but my heart couldn't grasp it... C.S. Lewis once said, “Experience: that most brutal of teachers. But you learn, my God do you learn.”

This experience, pregnancy, isn't "brutal" :) (sometimes the nausea and discomfort are difficult but not brutal knowing that a baby is the reason behind it all) but it definitely has taught me a great deal. This is deep, :) but it also draws my mind to Christ and how he came down and was tempted in all ways as we are .... having Him as our high priest - One who can sympathize with us. He came to save us...to make a way to have a deep and lasting relationship with Himself and God. Along that journey in our skin He was tempted as we are.

He endured human temptations and felt emotion. He had his heartbroken and He danced. He had friends betray Him and wept for those were lost.

Hebrews 4:15 (NASB)
For we do not have a high priest who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses, but One who has been tempted in all things as we are, yet without sin.

Hebrews 4:14 (The Message Version)
[ The High Priest Who Cried Out in Pain ] Now that we know what we have—Jesus, this great High Priest with ready access to God—let's not let it slip through our fingers. We don't have a priest who is out of touch with our reality. He's been through weakness and testing, experienced it all—all but the sin. So let's walk right up to him and get what he is so ready to give. Take the mercy, accept the help.

I LOVE that about our God... He is engaged and involved. He desires relationship not religion. The author of "The Shack" wrote to this by saying that "relationship can be messy." I think that is why so many of us reach out to religion- rituals, rules, etc as a way to control what we are doing... to do something in hopes of receiving (approval, our wants, our needs, love, etc). Yet, with relationship we give our time and heart. We talk... we wait. We listen.

Despite our propensity to control....
Ephesians 2:7
Now God has us where he wants us, with all the time in this world and the next to shower grace and kindness upon us in Christ Jesus.

I must have a need for Grace (unearned favor). :) We fall but He never leaves us. Trusting Him is as if learning to walk for the first time. It's not always easy or automatic, we have to choose to put our hope/faith/trust in Him. We can ask for faith and we can seek Him to know Him more. Grace covers it all... The peace and joy that flow from seeking Him is beautiful... the heart can't get enough.

I love having a God Who walked in our shoes and is invovled in our lives. He is good...

Thank you, God, for teaching me deeper levels of love and humility through this beautiful experience of parenting. Thank you, God, for helping me to more fully rejoice with those who rejoice (via this experience) as well as for the times that have taught me to grieve/mourn with those who mourn. Your comfort is abundant.

Love,
Mer.